Climate change? Nothing Greta and a time machine can't fix
OH what a time to be alive!
With Greta Thunberg taking over from Angela Merkel as the leader of the free world this week we really are right slap bang in the middle of a great moment in history.
Just like everyone else, every time I think of history, which is all the time, I wonder why Elon Musk is taking so long to come up with an eco-friendly Tesla time machine.
Because right here and right now is one of those points in history that future generations will want to return to and carry out some Terminator style historical re-adjustment...if you know what I mean.
My advice to Greta Thunberg and her fellow Climate Strikers is to start making a list. One you can have stuck on the door of your fully sentient fridge in 2050.
So when you travel back in the Time Tesla from 2050 to 2019 you will know which world class environmental vandal to re-adjust.
Because lets face it none of today's blonde man babies, kleptocrats, happy clappers or crypto fascist billionaires has any intention of applying the brakes to the money bulldozer currently pushing us towards the brink of extinction.
But there may be a better way.
The temptation right now would be to de-Trump the whole situation, and certainly the look on young Greta's face when she ran into POTUS at the UN, spoke for many of us this week.
Sure, by coming back and re-adjusting Trump you would have the eternal gratitude of the 22 women who have so far accused him of sexual misconduct, but we would wind up with President Mike Pence, an evangelical Christian afraid to be in a room alone with a woman.
Tempting as it is to de-Trump, he is really just one of the symptoms of a deeper malignancy within the world's body politic, metaphorically speaking of course.
No, we have to wait a little while longer to identify the real Hitler of climate destruction (of course it will be a him).
And there it is...the 'H' word.
Hitler- world's best practice when it comes to systematic evil and the one we usually identify as worthy of some extreme post historical re-adjustment if we could travel back in time.
But not for me. If I had the chance to jump in Elon's Time Tesla I wouldn't go back and re-adjust anyone. I would just swerve around the problem.
I would go back and buy Leopold Lojka a map of Sarajevo.
Poor old Leo was the chauffeur of the car carrying Austro-Hungarian Archduke Franz Ferdinand at the time of Ferdinand's assassination in Sarajevo in 1914.
Leo got lost, took a wrong turn and pulled up right in front of the assassin, Gavrilo Princip who re-adjusted Franz Ferdinand and his wife.
Long story short, it kicked off World War One, which in turn delivered us Hitler, the ongoing disaster in the Middle East, you name it, it started there. (No time to explain- go read a history book).
If Leo didn't get lost then there's no assassination and no trigger for war.
Likewise the answer to our current climate problems may simply be to go back to 1839 and give Alex Becquerel a couple of million dollars R&D money.
Turns out Alex is the French physicist credited with discovering the photovoltaic effect, the operating principle of the solar cell.
Job done. Now we are just waiting for Elon to pull his finger out.