BYRON: Tom Gleeson on his latest Go Away segment.
BYRON: Tom Gleeson on his latest Go Away segment.

Tom Gleeson, you have NO idea how s--t Byron really is

THE EDITOR of Byron Shire News has lashed out at ABC funny man Tom Gleeson for his totally half-arsed attempt to ridicule Byron Bay and the dwindling number of people rich and/or crazy enough to still call it home.

Hard man Gleeson's satirical travel industry puff piece aired on this week's edition of The Weekly with Charlie Pickering on ABCTV.

"This ABC fat cat arrives in Byron, alights from his tax payer funded mink lined speedboat, prances around for a couple of days and thinks he can sum up how shit Byron is," the criminally underpaid hack shouted above the din of bad drumming and finger cymbals.

"He's a lightweight, the only people who know how laughable this place is are the people who live the so-called Byron experience day-in-day out.

"I didn't see Gleeson sitting in the traffic jam out on the M1, queueing to get through the Guiness Book of Record's world's smallest roundabout then past the barbed wire disco dick so he could join the Ewingsdale Road traffic jam to get into the CBD and take his chances wandering amongst the throngs of un-vaccinated trust-a-farians lolling around the over-priced vegan cafes.

"He thinks a couple of rehab jokes and a massage pun can sum up our rainbow of shit-ness.

"Gleeson should have bought his family up here and tried to find somewhere decent and affordable to live, then he would have known he was alive.

"He probably Airbnb-ed it as well, not even suspecting he was joining the ranks of those making the place more shit.

"But like all the Pinot Noir guzzling big city media types who come to Byron to do their obligatory "How weird and messed up is Byron Bay" stories, he'd probably give his left testicle to live here."